So my friends decided that last night would be a fun time to force me into being social with them in real life.

My usual part­ing phrase of the night is, ’ it was divert­ing’ but even that’s a lie, last night just was another punch to the stomach.

Silly me, of course my fail­ure at life was my choice. And of course all my emo­tional and psy­cho­log­i­cal prob­lems are my choices too.

This is just a role I already play per­fectly, right, so why would I ever want to change?

Kinda hurts, a lot, to know that even my sup­posed friends feel that way about me, like I want to be a twenty-six year old fail­ure at every­thing, liv­ing on my aunt’s couch, with absolutely no direc­tion in life.

Because of course, this is the life I’d choose for myself, yeah, just like peo­ple “choose” to be hated for being jew­ish, or mus­lim, or lgbt, etc.