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attempt­ing to tran­scend the char­ac­tero­log­i­cal lie about reality

me

What exactly is the char­ac­tero­log­i­cal lie about real­ity and why am I hop­ing to tran­scend it?

For that mat­ter, who on earth am I and why do I feel spe­cial enough to bother host­ing my own web­site instead of suc­cumb­ing to the likes of myspace, face­book, blogspot, etc.?

Really, I’m not sure about either ques­tion, I just like sound­ing sophis­ti­cated, since “fak­ing it” seems to be the only thing in life that I’m good at.

As for the about me part, well, I’m a twenty-six year old from south­ern cal­i­for­nia, going on 12 and 35 at the same time, with a his­tory of not fin­ish­ing what I start, and being the fam­ily odd-ball (you know, the child/sibling/relative you never want to men­tion when peo­ple ask about your fam­ily, when its always, “Joe just got mar­ried, fin­ished his mas­ters, and is teach­ing at some pres­ti­gious school, Susie is mar­ried, preg­nant, sta­ble suc­cess­ful job, and just bought a new house, and then there’s me, sin­gle, une­d­u­cated, unem­ployed, and going nowhere in life.)

Thus far to date I have failed at:

  • High School — I failed a num­ber of classes and dropped out of high school 3/4 through my junior year, though I com­pleted my GED a few years later
  • Col­lege — I took 4 years to fin­ish my AA, have not fin­ished a BA
  • Work — I’m cur­rently unem­ployed, my longest job lasted 2 years, work­ing retail for home depot
  • Ser­vice — I joined the navy, and was sep­a­rated for men­tal health & depres­sion after 6 months
  • Love — longest rela­tion­ship was 5–6 months, most last 1–2 months
  • Finan­cial Respon­si­bil­ity — I’ve blown a $26,000 law­suit set­tle­ment, and $20,000 inher­i­tance from my fathers life insur­ance, and have no sav­ings and noth­ing to show for either.
  • Self Suf­fi­ciency — I moved out on my own once, for 2 months back in 2004, and have sub­se­quently lived with my mom ever since (except­ing my 6 months in the navy)
  • Cre­ativ­ity — I’ve dab­bled in pho­tog­ra­phy, videog­ra­phy, and cre­ative writ­ing, and have had no suc­cess in any field
  • Life in gen­eral — Basi­cally I’m a fail­ure at life, so why are you still here?